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Sometimes it seems like everyone is scolding me for something or other.  Of course, my head is doing the same thing. But how do you change the soundtrack?

I’ve been struggling with this.  How can I, for instance feel like I do in summer, when it is so obviously not?  It was looking like I’d have to lie to myself.

But I forgot: you don’t have to go from 0 to 60 in one breath.  Sometimes it’s enough to just rev up the engine a little.

Whenever I’m feeling low I simply remember my favorite things and then I don’t feel so bad.  Perhaps a list of some of my favorite things might help to have on hand: Summer breezes through my hair, getting into bed with clean sheets, new, colorful office supplies, any America song, finding the right answer, a few hours stretching out in front of me to write, or having nowhere to go.

So, when I find myself churning over some silly thing I can’t do anything about at the moment, I’m going to center myself.  Just a moment’s awareness will do. Then I can find something, anything at all that feels better than whatever nonsense or scolding is cluttering up my mind.  Maybe about the movie I’m going to be watching that evening.  If I’m having a hard time, I might try that the sun is shining or that my heart is pumping blood and I’m alive.  Usually there’s something I can go to.  Even a drink of cool water. 

I’ve come to see (though I knew before) with the help of Paulette Terrels, that it’s such a waste of time and energy to listen to those scolding voices. It does me no good to chew on the lousy weather or a tedious project I have to do, that it’s only Tuesday . . .   When all I have to do is think about Harry Potter and I’m back on track.  From there it’s not hard to find something better and better and then I’m cruising along at a comfortable 45.  Much easier to get to 60 from there!

 

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