Sometimes this process can be frustrating. I keep moving things out of the way. I feel differently, but the physical plane hasn’t quite caught up yet. Now, I am starting to see some of the manifestations of this work I’m doing. For one thing, letting go of all the chattering around dieting and what I’m eating has quieted things down quite a bit. I seem to have more energy now that my systems are working for me instead of against me. (I admit, there are still a few kinks to work out, but I am making progress.) I am also finding that I am going a little easier on myself. This, I have to admit, produces more progress. A funny thing that. Going easier on myself helps me to do more.

All of this is producing a clarity around me. That I can see more clearly what needs to be done and what doesn’t need to be. Life just feels easier.

I’m still scared, of course. I’m fond of reminding myself what Susan Jeffers teaches: that fear will always be a constant traveling companion. Along with its nasty incarnations of sadness, doubt, resentment (even hatred?) Maria Nemeth is instructing me to take a look at those feelings, that shadow side. The Women Food and God plan has me remembering that I can’t get rid of it with food either.

The only way to transmute any of that stuff and turn them into something infinitely more palatable is by applying the heat of awareness.

So, if I’m not running away from my fears so much, I can stop to clear the path ahead and select what I want to take along.

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